Layla's Birthday Wakeup Call:

Me: Hey birthday girl. It's time to get up

Layla: jkhdfskjhsdjhjhdfh...lemme sleep....kjfalskdhflshdfkjhaksjfk

Me: Layla come on now. You have to get ready for school. It's your birthday! Don't you want to see your friends today? Don't you want to have cupcakes at lunch?

Layla: ;lakshdfkhasdkfsjhgflskdfhg....no.....k;laksdfkjgsdfjglkjhf;ljsf'lhljfg

Me: Layla Mason (in that mommy is becoming impatient tone) You are going to get up right now. Lets go.

Layla: lkjasdfhashfashfkajsfhkjh....ugh!

Me: Come one now Layla, it's your birthday. Lets go. Lets have fun today!

Layla: (She turns and finally looks at me) You know what I want for my birthday mommy?

Me: No what baby.

Layla: For you to leave my room and let me sleep.

Me: Hahahahaha!!! You are so funny! Hahahhahahaha!!! ....Get up.

Layla: You're mean mommy.

Me: I know.

An open letter to Christina Aguilera.

Dear Christina,

I used to really respect you as an artist. I loved your last album. It suited your voice and it suited you. This time around it just feels like you're a step behind and copping other artists identities. Okay and the new video... I needed a shower afterwards. Truly. I have seen every Lady GaGa video and you out skeezed them all. (By the way, she called and want's all her costumes back.) You have a son for goodness sake. He will never learn how to respect women when his own mother prances around in pasties and simulates sex with a man that isn't his father in her videos. And to top it all off your attitude has gotten atrocious.

Really Christina? Do you think that fake laugh is fooling anyone? I hope you realize that you are one of the worlds best but also that talent can be taken away as quickly as it is given. The world wants to see you as you truly are not as artistic sloppy seconds.

Sincerely,

Jessica Taylor